Audio

[feudalladyshandmaid]

--ust speak into it." What? My hand?

[The voice of a young woman comes through the speakers, cut off at first and growing faint Like the person is leaning away from the speaker.]

Hello? Anyone, no this isn't working, is it? Of course not. Okay. Speak clearly into...

[oh dear]

Hello? Anyone out there? Someone can hear this, right? Hold on, maybe the knob-

[There's a rather startling amount of feedback static bursting out of the speaker for a couple seconds, along with a very distressed groan.]

Come on. You'd think it'd be easy as pushing a button, or-

[It cuts off there. Apparently, someone found the 'off' switch.]

Comments

@PAPYRUS - audio

[spaghettimonster]

Hello, yes, you're coming in loud and unclear.

[That was a whole burst of static there. Not exactly his favorite sound in the world.]

But you're getting closer!

[feudalladyshandmaid]

Perfect. That's almost what I wanted.

[Augh. More static.]

Sorry, I... I don't know what I'm doing.

[spaghettimonster]

Well, you've called the right sk-- skilled person. I know loads about talking on phones, and radios are pretty close. I'm happy to help!

For a start, whatever you're doing, before the static: don't do that.

[feudalladyshandmaid]

Wait, I thought this was a- [Actually, you know what? She's already confused.] Never mind.

Okay. I'm not doing... whatever that did anymore. I had no idea these things could get that loud.

[spaghettimonster]

It's meant for hearing, so the loudness must be a great feature!

[Especially for people who want high volume noises, like everyone who listens to him for more than a few minutes.]

[feudalladyshandmaid]

Not when it's being loud right in your face.

[Someone else's face? Well, that's a different story entirely. Maybe it could do as a quick distraction, but other than that...]

But then maybe that is it's greatest feature.

[spaghettimonster]

I'm sure it could wake anybody up.

[The wrist radios aren't advertised as doubling as alarm clocks - they're not advertised at all, that he's seen - but they could be. Hopefully nobody starts a rash of static-filled prank calls anytime soon.]

But that's not a request! Don't call me in the middle of the night like that, unless it's an emergency.

[feudalladyshandmaid]

Hey, look on the bright side! If there is an emergency, you'll probably hear it coming. Either because of these things, or just because everyone else is screaming.

That might actually be less annoying.

[spaghettimonster]

Being woken by screams is the better option, by leaps and bounds!!

I'd really know what I was in for, then.

[As much as he's joking sarcastically, here's a thin vein of sincerity in it. If only because the squealing static was alarming, purposeless, and reminded him of some creepier static he'd prefer not to remember.]